Monday, March 1, 2010

Aquarium Net

Curriculum Vitae

Aquarium net.

I am an 8 x 6 inch aquarium net with a 12-inch handle. Manufactured from high quality, rust proof, materials I am suitable for salt or freshwater aquarium use. I have no sharp corners that might damage fish or aquarium accessories.

* Honoured with respectful removal of Mr Webber’s beloved Angel Fish “Buffy” following her tragic death in 2009.
* Removed diamond ring from the aquarium after fiancée incident.

Work History
10/08 - 04/10 Chief aquarium net. Employed on the motor yacht Pluto as saltwater aquarium net. Following the purchase of the yacht Pluto Mr Webber moved his aquarium once again. I was retained as chief net and was often the focus of conversation as I was now Mr Webber’s longest serving item of aquarium equipment.

06/05 - 10/08 Chief aquarium net. Employed at Hathaway, Guilt & Webber as saltwater aquarium net. When the aquarium moved into Mr Webber’s office I became chief aquarium net. My main duties were to remove, with all due reverence, deceased fish from the tank.

03/03 - 06/05 Secondary aquarium net. Worked for John Webber as saltwater aquarium net. My first job entailed general cleaning duties; removal of food debris, removal of plant debris and unsightly fish faeces.

I was manufactured by Yiwu Baojie Aquarium Equipment Business, No.H4-28671, International Trade City, China Small Commodity City, Yiwu City, Jinhua, Zhejiang, China (Mainland) Zip: 322000 and passed all quality control checks.

Spare Time Activities
I enjoy hanging on hooks.

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